Confessions of an Anti-Social Gamer

I love video games. They are my drug. I feel happy when I play them.  People tell me that I should get out more, but the truth is I wouldn't have the slightest idea of where I would go. With video games, I have purpose. I have places to go, people to see, people to rescue, bad guys to vanquish, monsters to slay. In video games, I'm a hero.

It's the sense of agency that video games give us that makes them such a powerful medium. It's the fact that our decisions make a difference that we notice. It may be simple cause -> effect based gameplay that most games have that give us that power fantasy. Some games do things in a more subtle way, but there's nothing wrong with saving the world and looking like a badass doing it.

I like video games, because I can still express myself through my character, even though my dialogue tree is limited, I still do what I think that I should do in that situation. But, video games also offer me freedoms that this world does not. I can be evil, and not regret it... all too much. After all, they're just video game characters. I tend to empathise with a lot of characters that I come across, but that doesn't mean that I can just save, do something mean and then reload. I can totally end the feud of the two estates on Dantooine with a total massacre. I can totally push the bad guy out a window, rather than let him live and be merciful.

Lately I've been going through my backlog of video games. Starting with Final Fantasy X. It's a bit of an undertaking to start off with such a lengthy game, but I really like it. It's a big deal for me to like a Final Fantasy game. I feel like it flows and also has a really great battle system. The freedom that Final Fantasy X offers me, is the characters that I get to spend time with. The script, and the voice acting aren't top notch by any means, but you get a sense of who the characters are, and what they believe in. You get to know their goals, dreams and principles. I'm only about 20 hours into it, but it's been really enjoyable. I'd like to visit other Final Fantasy games, that don't let their gameplay get in the way of the story, or any other JRPG that I can commit to. It's difficult for me to get into them because I was raised on western story telling, but it also makes it interesting to compare and contrast the archetypes of the different cultures. Video games offer perspective.

It's been a while since I've updated, but at least I'm coming back to you on a weekly basis. Life has been full of distractions and problems that tend to get in my way. Some days I waste away on Facebook, Tumblr, or Youtube. Some days I play video games. I like those days.